Trimming the Green

It happened one year as Chuck Hudiburgh and his wife watched their three children tear through a mountain of gifts, hardly pausing to admire presents that had strained the family budget.

“My wife and I looked at each other and shook our heads. I thought, ‘They don’t even appreciate it.’ But we had set up this Santa mentality,” Hudiburgh said.

This year, the Hudiburghs have allocated $250 for gifts, about a third of what they used to spend. That’s well below the national average of $779 consumers are projected to spend on gifts this year, according to a survey by the Los Angeles-based Deloitte & Touche accounting firm.

Instead of buying expensive presents, the Hudiburghs will bake cookies and give them as gifts to relatives. They’ll celebrate the season by holding family get-togethers.

“Christmas has changed a lot in our family,” Hudiburgh said. “We still have a tree and some presents, but now we give the gift of time. If we can get together as a family, that’s enough.”

“Enough.” That word can easily get lost amid all of the holiday hype.

This is the season to overspend, a time many reach for their credit cards to buy Christmas and Hanukkah gifts. Last year nearly one-third of adults said they spent more than they planned on holiday gifts, according to a recent study by the National Foundation for Consumer Credit.

Yet some people, like the Hudiburghs, have decided to simplify the season. They’ve scaled back spending and found other ways to mark the holidays. They’re turning to guidebooks such as “Simple Abundance” (Warner Books, 1996) and “Your Money or Your Life” (Viking Books, 1993) for ways to curtail consumption.

“A lot of people are realizing there’s no peace in all this spending. They’ve reached a point where they’re saying, ‘I have more things. So why am I so worried?’ ” said Hudiburgh, executive director of Christian Credit Counselors International in Santa Ana, a nonprofit group that advises those in debt.

The holidays used to be a source of great worry for Jean, a Laguna Beach resident and member of Debtors Anonymous, a support group for people addicted to spending that follows a 12-step program similar to that employed by Alcoholics Anonymous. Until she joined DA, Jean maxed out her credit cards buying holiday gifts she couldn’t afford.

“I used to think I had permission to incur debt during the holidays because everybody did,” she said. “We’re surrounded by holiday decorations and ads in billboards and magazines, and there’s a feeling of wanting to be a part of it all.”

This year Jean has set aside $400 for presents. Before she heads to the stores, she will call another DA member to report exactly what she intends to buy, and when she returns home from her shopping trip she’ll call to report how much she spent. The system makes her accountable for every purchase and helps her avoid impulse buys.

“Now I plan,” she said. “I know what Christmas will cost me because I write everything down and I save toward it. It’s not a surprise anymore.”

For many, the amount they spend on holiday gifts comes as a huge surprise. Hudiburgh, who counsels people with debt problems, knows it’s not a good sign that his client load declines from now until New Year’s.

“They’re out there shopping, and they don’t want to think about what they’re spending,” he said.

Come February, they’ll be back. When the credit card statements roll in, he’ll be mobbed by people overwhelmed by debt, Hudiburgh said.

“The spirit of giving is admirable, but it can be taken to the extreme. We get caught up in the emotion and go beyond our means,” Hudiburgh said. “Children today get about 300% more toys than kids did in the ‘60s. Between grandparents, aunts, uncles and parents giving them gifts, we’ve just gone crazy.

“We need to ask why we’re doing this. Is it out of guilt because we don’t have time for our children and we’re trying to buy their love?”

Adults can go overboard on gifts to win their children’s affection or parents’ approval. Some compete with their siblings over who gives the best presents to Mom and Dad.

“Some family members like to get one up on each other,” Hudiburgh said. “They think, ‘I make good money, and I give the best presents,’ or ‘I gave Mom a better present than the others last year. How can I do better this year?’ ”

*

Buying lavish gifts can become a way of shoring up sagging self-esteem. Some want to convince themselves they’re a good person or impress others.

“We want people to believe we have more than we do, because society says if we have more, then we belong. We’re a success,” said Theresa Boston, educational facilitator with Consumer Credit Counseling Service (CCCS) of Orange County in Santa Ana, which offers a variety of debt management programs.

Boston recently led a workshop on managing financial stress, the chief source of which is, she said, “we feel we have to buy, buy, buy, and we can’t possibly keep up.”

To keep from letting emotions take over during the season, credit counselors suggest consumers avoid the stores unless armed with a list of gifts to buy and a spending limit for each item. That helps keep shoppers from being swept up in their emotions and keeps them soberly focused on their budget.

“People don’t plan ahead. You have to make a list and stick with your budget, because stores know that once you’re in the spirit, you’ll spend like mad,” Boston said.

Lori, a San Clemente woman in her early 30s, is eight months away from being debt-free after following CCCS’s debt reduction plan for three years. She’s not about to let the holiday season sabotage her budget.

“Now I’m a cash-only person,” she said. “Before, as long as I had a credit card, I’d buy it.” All year long, Lori had money automatically deposited from her paycheck into a special holiday gift account.

“I just got my check. I have the money I need for gifts, and I don’t have to worry about it,” she said.

If strapped for cash this season, CCCS suggests calling family members and agreeing to limit the amount everyone spends on gifts. If there are many siblings, pull names from a hat or agree not to exchange gifts at all. Most will feel relieved that they can cross a few names off their list.

Don’t charge presents on credit cards--that’s the universal holiday spending rule. Even the person who charges and pays off the balance in full spends 30% more than the person who buys with cash, according to Christian Credit Counselors.

When paying by cash, shoppers evaluate the purchase more closely. The dollar amount becomes real instead of an abstract number. That’s why credit counselors believe department store clerks ask, “Will this be on your card?” instead of “Cash or credit?”

“It’s critical to spend within our means. Otherwise we’re giving something we really don’t have,” Hudiburgh said. People shouldn’t go into debt to show their love, he said.

“When you can’t buy, don’t. Bake cookies, make personal cards on the computer or do something that takes labor. That’s a greater gift than buying things you can’t afford.”

* Christian Credit Counselors International: (888) 546-8435.

* Consumer Credit Counseling Service of Orange County: (714) 547-2227.

(BEGIN TEXT OF INFOBOX / INFOGRAPHIC)

Tips for Scaling Down * Establish spending limits for gifts.

* Don’t use credit cards. If possible, pay with cash. You’ll be more conscious of the amount you’ve spent if you’re parting with real dollars.

* Suggest pick-a-name gift exchanges if you have a large family.

* Ask for gift ideas. Have family members suggest four or five items they want.

* Make short shopping trips. It’s easier to monitor purchases and expenditures. And you won’t be fatigued.

* Shop discount stores and outlets for low-priced gifts.

* Keep a running total of every dollar spent. This increases your accountability.

* Buy bags and bows you can use year after year. Theresa Boston, a facilitator with Consumer Credit Counseling Service of Orange County in Santa Ana, has circulated the same box for five years. “Everyone knows to give me that box back.”

* Shop for gifts year round so you’ve wrapped up your shopping in November, before the holiday hype and temptation to overspend kicks into high gear.

* Ask yourself if you really need that new holiday outfit. One woman created a “new” holiday ensemble by attaching sequined poinsettia appliques on the front of a white suit.

* Replace gift exchanges with a different holiday tradition, such as family sing-alongs or visits to local light displays.

* Establish a holiday account with your bank or employer that automatically deducts an amount for gifts from each paycheck.

* Do something nice for yourself so you don’t feel a compulsion to overdo for others. Indulging in a manicure or massage reduces stress, which causes people to overspend.

For more information, the Consumer Credit Counseling Service of Orange County has a free handout, “Surviving the Holidays.” The nonprofit will hold a free holiday workshop on managing financial stress at 7 p.m. Wednesday at the Brea Community Center, 695 Madison Way. (714) 547-2227.