Kids These Days:

On July 25, the publicity over the huge waves at the Wedge convinced me that I had to go see them in person. Anticipating a large crowd, I decided to ride my bicycle instead of drive. That was a very good idea. The traffic was horrible. Cars were lined up bumper-to-bumper for miles with no remedy in sight.

Since then, the city of Newport Beach has wisely decided to review the parking issue on the peninsula, which is bad most summer weekends, not just when the Wedge is acting up.

My two suggestions to this problem are to consider a park-and-ride agreement with a local parking structure (there are two structures that come immediately to mind) or simply limiting traffic.

On the ride down, something happened to me that had not happened in 46 years of bike riding. As I was nearing the Wedge, a boy of about 13 opened his passenger side car door right into me, knocking me over.

But wait, there’s more! On the way home, another fellow also opened his car door on me, knocking me down.

Neither accident caused any serious injury, and my bike was not damaged. What I came away with, however, was the realization that while riding my bike to the Wedge was a good idea, riding without a helmet was not.

I have never worn a bike helmet, which is just plain irresponsible, and that will change immediately. But there is a deeper significance to my helmetless riding, one that I may not be able to correct.

As of 2003, all bike riders under the age of 18 are required under California law to wear a helmet. I am afraid that because I did not wear a helmet during all the years I was riding with our kids — who did wear helmets — our daughter, 19, has decided that she doesn’t need to wear one, either. So, she does not.

That she does not wear a helmet is no surprise. Kids often mirror their parents’ behavior, even after they go through any sort of rebellious stage. When they come out on the other side of realizing that their parents are not the complete idiots they thought, they start to do more sensible things.

Of course, there is still an opportunity for me to persuade our daughter to wear a helmet, but the time to start was when she was old enough to see.

Parental influence should never be underestimated. Kids watch their parents and behave accordingly without even realizing it.

That doesn’t mean kids will automatically do whatever their parents do, but the chances of kids adopting a certain behavior are greatly increased if parents are setting an example.

Still, it is not easy for many parents to exhibit the type of behavior they’d like.

Single parents, divorced parents and blended families all have a unique set of challenges that make it difficult to teach kids the right or wrong way to do certain things.

I have found on my own and through working with many parents over the past 11 years that one of the keys to helping kids mirror good behavior is to spend as much time as possible with them during the first few years of their lives, say, until age 5 or 6.

Parents are not off the hook after that age, but through that age, kids begin to form the habits that will carry them through their terrible teens.

For many years, I spoke to groups all over Orange County and elsewhere, teaching parents how to spend more time with their kids.

It sounds odd, I know, but in this age of two-income homes, the Internet and cable television with hundreds of channels, there is a lot of competition for time.

If your PTA or other organization would like to have me speak on this subject, call the Daily Pilot and leave a message, or leave a note with your contact information online at the end of this column. There is no charge, and I am not selling anything.

And if I ride my bike to your meeting, you will be darn sure I will be wearing a helmet.

STEVE SMITH is a Costa Mesa resident and a freelance writer. Send story ideas to [email protected].