Calls it like he sees it

Just a day after working his second Super Bowl as an NFL side judge,

Orange Coast College soccer coach and teacher Laird Hayes went back

to school to start the new semester.

On Friday, walking from his office to the football field bleachers

for an interview with the Pilot’s Mike Swanson, three passersby,

including two players, congratulated him for working a great game.

“This has been happening all week,” Hayes said. “I love it.”

Before the formal interview began, Hayes managed to get in a few

words about his quarterback and receiver camp for kids and the new

soccer field at OCC that he expects to be “English Premier

League-quality.” Before that, he was teaching a surfing class from 8

a.m. to noon just east of the Newport pier.

With the football season finished, Hayes can’t begin to think

about taking a break, but he doesn’t want one anyway.

Where’d you grow up, what brought you to Newport and what got you

started with officiating?

I grew up in Santa Barbara and I did all my schooling in the

public school system there. Graduated from high school in ‘67, played

football, basketball, baseball, was involved in student government,

played in the orchestra on campus. When I went back to Princeton, I

played very little freshman football, but I played baseball for four

years, first year on the freshman team and then three years I was the

backup catcher on the varsity team. Then during the summers, I used

to go down to Mexico and help my mom. She ran a conversational

Spanish tour down to the inner part of Mexico. Took American kids who

wanted to learn conversational Spanish and called it “July in

Mexico,” so that’s how I spent my summers, and surfed a little bit in

Santa Barbara. Went to graduate school at UCLA and finished there in

five years. I worked in the residence halls and did a lot of

intramural officiating and at Princeton, I officiated basketball my

junior and senior year just to pick up extra money and get some

exercise. My dad suggested, when I came out here to grad school, that

I do high school basketball, which had never really crossed my mind.

So I joined the L.A. Basketball Officials Assn., and through that,

met a core group of people that eventually came in contact with

through the NFL. The first basketball game I ever reffed was a

frosh/soph game up in Pasadena, and the other official was a guy

named Dale Williams, who’s worked two or three Super Bowls. He’s a

head linesman in the NFL now, so the first high school event I ever

did was with a guy now that I officiate with in the NFL. When I got

hired here at Orange Coast in 1976, I joined the Orange County

Football Officials Assn. because I thought football would be a gas.

You know, working Friday nights, high school varsity games -- that

was my goal. Never even thought about going higher; that was for

other guys. Then I got hooked up with some people who officiated in

the Pac-10 and so I thought, ‘That’d be kind of cool,’ so I just

started working my way up. Frosh/soph games, varsity games, then on a

high school varsity crew, then junior college games and being here at

OCC, being hired as an administrator, and I got to know through all

these meetings all of the assigners for the different sports. They

started assigning me probably before I was prepared or qualified to

work, but that’s the way life kind of works. I did OK, did some JC

games, and then one my buddies who was a lifelong referee in the

Pac-10 thought I ought to consider applying to the Pac-10, so

eventually I got into the Pac-10, in 1983, and then it wasn’t until

10 years later that I got on a crew in the Pac-10.... You can’t practice football officiating. You’ve got to go out and do it, and

it’s just getting all those cumulative experiences under your belt.

You coach soccer, you teach surfing and you’re an NFL side judge.

Anything else?

I also teach first aid and CPR, and I’ve taught a variety of

things: table tennis, weight training, we used to have a surf team

here that I coached. The college has been so supportive of everything

I’ve done. From my football officiating to giving me an opportunity

to start new courses here (I used to teach step aerobics, taught aqua

fitness) and even now that this NFL thing has kind of ratcheted up,

the college president and our dean, Fred Hokanson, and the faculty

that cover classes for me on the rare occasion that I’m not here. I

don’t miss [many] classes at all, unless I have a Monday Night

Football game or a Sunday night game, because I leave Saturday

morning and come back Sunday night. Our soccer games are always

Monday through Friday, never on the weekends. A couple years ago we

went to the state championships and lost in the finals, and I

obviously wasn’t going to miss that. That’s what I’m hired to do.

This is my full-time job. I’ve always said that if the NFL said

you’ve got to make a decision to become full time or not and that

meant giving up this job and doing the NFL, I’d give up the NFL. I’ve

got the greatest job in the world here at Orange Coast College, as

you can probably tell. My buddies from Princeton who are making $8

million a year kind of look me go, ‘Gosh, why don’t I do what you

do.’ You don’t get real rich doing this, but richness to me is not

measured in dollars and cents; it’s quality of life and boy, I have

that here.

Who’s the most difficult wide receiver to deal with in the NFL?

Ooh, well, this postseason, it’s Isaac Bruce, but they’re always

trying to work you and I can understand that. They want an edge and

that’s a tough position. They’ve got cornerbacks pounding them all

the way down and they want the advantage. I’m not so sure if they’re

always suggesting that on a particular play they complain about that

they thought you should have called it then, but they’re probably

setting you up for something down the road. But I don’t buy into that

stuff. At least consciously.

Do you plan to stay a side judge, or do other refereeing posts

intrigue you?

It’s too late for me to change positions. I’m too old. I don’t

feel old, and I think I’m in good shape for being 54 years old. The

only other position I’d want to work would be referee, and about five

or six years ago I made myself available to be considered as a

possible referee, and for some reason, I’ve never been told why, I

was not in their plans for that. You’ve got to have strong officials

at each position, and mine [as a side judge] is a critical one. The

NFL’s a passing game now, and I’m deep, watching sideline stuff,

passes, and it’s tough. What’s pass interference and what isn’t pass

interference? And, I’m on each sideline for half the game, so I’ve

got coaches upset, players upset and I’ve got to keep the peace. I’ve

got to communicate to them what’s going on out there and I can never

lose my cool. No matter what they’re saying, I’ve got to be cool,

calm and collected. I can’t become emotional about what’s going on

out there. I like the challenge of having to deal with volatile

situations. I enjoy explaining things to coaches, getting them to

calm down. Now if he’s profane to me, if he just won’t get away, he’s

being disrespectful, I’ll say ‘Coach, I can’t talk to you when you’re

like that. Let me know when you want to talk,’ in a gentlemanly sort

of way. But I can certainly understand them getting upset. I get

upset with officials all the time during soccer games, but the stakes

are so much higher for these [NFL] guys. They’re not going to fire me

down here if I lose a game. Look how many NFL coaches lost their jobs

this year.

What do think about all the fuss over the halftime show?

We didn’t know what had happened until the end. It was kind of an,

‘Oh, come on,’ deal to me after I heard about it. But, shoot, look at

the ads. Look at the erectile dysfunction ads. Don’t you have young

kids who say, ‘Mommy, daddy, what’s erectile dysfunction?’ I mean,

come on. At least a breast is part of the human anatomy. I’m not

happy about what happened, it was kind of low brow, but I think they

need to take a look at a lot of that stuff. When you’ve got horses

that are farting and dogs that are jumping and biting at somebody’s

crotch, I don’t know, where’s the limit? I read like everybody else,

though, that the NFL wasn’t too happy about the whole thing.

How long do you plan to keep refereeing?

As long as I’m healthy, but it depends on a lot of things. You’ve

got to be healthy, and my whole family has to be healthy with my

being gone, but assuming everything’s like it is right now, I’d like

to say I’m halfway through my NFL career. I’m nine years in and I

think an 18-year career would be pretty cool. I’m 54, so that would

take me to what, 63, 64. And the other deal is [12-year-old son] Andy. He’s a very good youth water polo player. Now whether he

continues to progress is just, you know, who can tell? But let’s say

he were ever to play college water polo, for instance. Their games

are during the fall and on the weekends. I’d quit in a heartbeat to

go watch him play water polo. You just don’t get that opportunity

again. I’ve had a great career with the NFL. I feel really blessed,

I’m starting my 10th year. Once you reach your 10th year, they give

you a ring -- your 10-year NFL ring, and that’s something I feel

really good about. A lot of guys never get to 10 years. And the Super

Bowl deal, I mean, holy smokes, to get two of these suckers in three

years, to get two in my career, most officials in the league never

get one, very few ever get two. During the season, honest to

goodness, the thought never crossed my mind once ... I really only

made two mistakes as far as the league was concerned. Did I make

other mistakes during the course of the season? You bet. Either they

didn’t see them, or, I don’t know, but I was very fortunate and I

hope I get another one of these things (a Super Bowl). You know, I

don’t drink, I don’t smoke -- this is my drug. You get a taste of a

couple Super Bowls and you want it again, but there are a ton of

other officials in our league that deserve the opportunity as much as

I do. But again, that’s not my decision, the league wanted me to work

that game, and I’m grateful to them for that.

So you have your first Sunday in a while this week that you don’t

have to ref a game. What do you plan to do?

I can’t wait. It’s not just Sunday, because I leave Saturday

morning, come back Sunday night. Saturday, Andy’s got a club lacrosse

game, then on Sunday, he’s got a tryout for some national team for

his junior water polo. He plays club water polo for Newport Beach.

It’s an all-day deal down at Capo Valley High School, so I’m just

going to be hanging out there watching him play water polo.

Long or short board?

I’m a long-board guy. I just never learned on a short board and I

get real stiff. What I think I’m real good at in the surfing class is

teaching raw-bone beginners how to stand up and how to catch

waves.... The thing about surfing is that it doesn’t matter how good

or how bad you are as long as you’re having fun. I just tell these

students, ‘Don’t compare yourself to anybody else; are you having

fun?’ I just love being down there. A lot of people think, oh

surfing, you’re just down there going ‘Hey dude.’ No, we’ve got a

syllabus, a curriculum, we do a beach safety thing through the city’s

lifeguard department. After every surf class, students have to pick

up trash in the area where we surf ... The ocean’s a resource you’ve

got to give back to. You can’t just take, take, take. It’s not just

taking from the ocean, it’s giving back to humankind. I mean, we’re

such a selfish, selfish society. It’s all about making money. The

number one goal should be to try to make the world a better place,

and people might say that’s just pie-in-the-sky stuff, but I don’t

know why it is. Why wouldn’t we want it to be a more peaceful world,

a safer world, where people are looking out for one another. I think

you can use the ocean as a metaphor: Let’s give back what we get from

it.