Don’t go riding without a diaper

LOLITA HARPER

They are not fashioned with elastic leg barriers or leak-guard. They

are not decorated with Sesame Street characters or cute cuddly bears.

And they are certainly not designed for newborns. But they are

diapers -- for horses.

Yes, horse diapers. Large, heavy, nylon diapers that come in a

variety of colors and designs, depending on the horse owner’s needs.

For the problem that plagues Santa Ana Heights, said horse diaper

manufacturer Lilamae Mayle of West Virginia, the “enclosed diaper” is

the best way to go. I caught her on the phone just before supper on

Wednesday and she gave her expert opinion on the subject.

“It’s a necessary case,” she said in a southern drawl. “About

everybody has to use them.”

Wow. If changing a baby’s diaper in considered a chore, imagine

cleaning the load out of a half-ton animal’s. That’s a lot of baby

wipes.

But horse diapers don’t necessarily work like that, she said.

These diapers catch the waste and hold on to it until you are ready

to drain it. They are quite popular in California, she said.

“We sell a lot there. What part are you in?” Lilamae asked. “Do

you know that Parker girl, with her own carriage company in San

Diego?”

No, I didn’t know the Parker girl, as Newport Beach is about 70

miles north of San Diego, but it seems that unsightly horse pies are

a common problem throughout the state. I told her of the mess in

Santa Ana Heights, which has now become Newport Beach, and now that

it has been annexed, is subject to the same waste cleanup rules as

are, say, dog owners. Of course the horse people don’t like this

because they say it is unsafe to dismount their animals mid-trail and

pick up their dung.

“Well, diapers would take care of all that,” Lilamae said. (By the

way, her name is pronounced with a short “I,” like “Lilla.”)

The enclosed diapers go directly on the horse, she said -- under

the tail, with two top straps that snap to the saddle. It also has

two bottom straps that go between the legs and snap to the saddle.

There is a zipper on the bottom for easy emptying while the horse is

still wearing it, and drainage holes for excess liquid to drain, she

said. To thoroughly clean the diaper, you just take the thing off and

give it a “good hose down,” she said.

The enclosed diapers come in black or brown and a variety of

sizes, from Minnys and small ponies ($35) to large pony and draft

size ($43.95, plus $5 shipping and handling.)

Lilamae’s husband Johnny designed this particular diaper while

working in a horse stable and used his own horses as models.

“He thought, ‘There must be a way to keep from cleaning these

stalls everyday,’ and finally sat down and drew up the design,”

Lilamae said. “We had our horses try them on to make sure they

worked, and they sure did.”

The Mayles decided to advertise their product and got mixed

reactions. Now most of their business comes from word of mouth.

“People make fun of them, of course, but others realize they work,

and that’s really all that matters,” Lilamae said.

Some cities have gone as far as to make horse diapers mandatory,

such as Lucedale, Miss., population 2,592. The Aldermen of Lucedale

passed an ordinance that would require all livestock, including

horses, cattle, sheep, mules and others, to be diapered when they

come into town.

I tried to get ahold of officials at Lucedale City Hall but my

messages, left in a Yankee accent, mixed with a little California

“valley” speech, went unreturned.

Lilamae said diaper laws may not be the best answer because people

don’t like to be forced into doing something. But if those Santa Ana

Heights folks want to ride their horses without worrying about

cleaning up, the Mayle family company, Horse Diapers-Feedbags, will

be glad to help out.

* LOLITA HARPER is the community forum editor. She also writes

columns Wednesdays and Fridays. She may be reached at (949) 574-4275

or by e-mail at [email protected].