But her sheets are so cheap

On the Martha Stewart Web site, the popular homemaker extraordinaire

announces her new “Stars and Stripes for Summer” line.

Well, if you take away the stars, you may have an idea of what is

in store for the master crafter.

If you haven’t heard by now, Stewart -- the woman who made a

living telling women they couldn’t live without pressed pansy

projects -- was indicted Wednesday on several counts of securities

fraud, conspiracy to obstruct justice and making false statements,

according to published reports. The U.S. Securities Exchange

Commission also filed a civil suit against her for allegedly trading

on an insider tip.

As the stories go, in December 2001, Stewart sold 4,000 shares of

ImClone -- headed by her close friend San Waksal -- the day before

Waksal delivered bad news that caused stocks to drop dramatically.

Stewart maintains her innocence and said on a specially designated

Web site that her sale was the result of previous conversations with

her stock broker about the price.

“The government’s attempt to criminalize these actions makes no

sense to me,” Stewart wrote on www.marthatalks.com, a Web site

designated to tell her side of the scandal and thank her supporters.

Although her magazine has reportedly lost 20% of its advertisers,

her stock was up Thursday.

At the Costa Mesa K-Mart, which is having a sale on items from the

Martha Stewart Everyday Home Collection, the charges were the center

of conversation.

K-Mart employee Pauline, who was busy restocking the shelves with

window coverings, said people had been talking about it all day.

“People tell me, ‘No, you can’t take her stuff off the shelves,’

but then there are those who never bought her stuff in the first

place,” said Pauline, who declined to give her last name.

Something about her uber-proper persona, her penchant for cake

decorating and cookie cutting makes her unlikable to some.

“She’s just too perfect,” Pauline said.

Those looking for a flaw have certainly found one.

“We lucked out, I guess,” K-Mart shopper Eva Seraphin said. “I

thought to myself, ‘Should I [go shopping] next week when she is

really in trouble?’ I would wait, but I wanted pillows.”

Seraphin is not necessarily a Martha Stewart hater, she is just

not a fan. She sees the 61-year-old blond on food shows while

flipping through the channels, she said, but has never stopped long

enough to take any of her culinary suggestions to heart.

“I have two kids and a dissertation to worry about. I don’t have

time,” Seraphin said.

She and her two children were taking advantage of the 20% discount

to buy a king-sized sheet to “make a huge tent in the living room.”

(Not one of the home decorating schemes on Stewart’s official Web

site.)

A Newport Beach woman who declined to give her name said she was

torn between principle and Stewart’s darling cherry curtains.

“I do have issues about supporting her, but I happen to like her

things,” she said. “Look at these. They’re discounted, and I like the

colors. I think to myself, ‘How long would it take me to sew these?’

and it just makes sense.”

The woman, who describes herself as a “die-hard honesty person”

said she is not sure what to believe about the homemaker

extraordinaire.

“It sounds a lot like she was not honest,” she said. “I have

several friends who are also unclear, but their husbands won’t even

let them whisper the MS name in the house.”

Why do you think that is?

“She was a woman with power, a female cutting in on the business

world,” the woman said. “To some men, that creates a problem.”

The Newport Beach woman touched on a sentiment that Stewart’s

lawyers have already pointed out. On the Martha Talks Web site, a

statement from Stewart’s attorneys is also posted. The statement asks

why the government waited so long to charge Stewart and if it was

motivated by her celebrity status.

“Is it because she is a woman who has successfully competed in a

man’s business world by virtue of her talent, hard work and demanding

standards?” the statement asks. “Is it because the government would

like to be able to define securities fraud as whatever it wants it to

be? Or is it because the Department of Justice is attempting to

divert the public’s attention from its failure to charge the

politically connected managers of Enron and WorldCom who may have

fleeced the public out of billions of dollars?”

Costa Mesa resident and shopper Lisa Simpson said she wasn’t

overly concerned with the answers to those questions. She took a very

practical position on the controversy and continued to stock her cart

with everyday sheets.

“Who can pass up deals like this?” Simpson said.

* LOLITA HARPER writes columns Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays and

covers culture and the arts. She may be reached at (949) 574-4275 or

by e-mail at [email protected].