And here’s the pitch ...

Andrew Glazer

The King of Sponges reigns over this land of superfluity. Star Mops

are stars and Super Mops save the day.

Everything here is sharper, stronger, easier, better, faster and if

you buy right now, cheaper, than the competition.

“I once knew a man who cut himself out of jail with one of these,”

said Scot Marks, 40, who deals Ginsu knives at the Orange County Fair.

“Don’t laugh, because you’re looking at him. No, I’m just kidding.”

With a microphone clamped to his head, Marks is only one of several

dozens of salesmen/showmen presenting their must-have products to

soon-to-be impulsive buyers in the fair’s Carnival of Products tent.

He spends two-thirds of the year hopping from state to state, sawing

nails, skinning tomatoes and selling the occasional knife.

“I practiced for a good two months before I could do this,” he said as

he sliced a spud into 20 identical poker chip-sized disks. “It’s like

theater.”

At the climax of his performance -- he sawed a groove into an aluminum

hammer! -- Marks drew a dozen spectators. He was able to turn one into a

customer.

“Of course, the last thing I need is a new set of knives,” said Heidi

Grice of Redondo Beach, who watched Marks’ entire demonstration. “But it

has a lifetime warranty. That helps.”In the olden days, fairs were a

forum to show off important new products and inventions. Lightbulbs, ice

cream cones and nylon all debuted at various American fairs.

But it’s become more difficult for fairs to showcase truly innovative

products, with the ubiquity of catalogues, malls, advertisements and

e-commerce. That’s where the art of the sales pitch comes in.

“You have to create the need,” said Curt Barnes, 44, a Super Cooker

salesman who has a made-for-infomercial bronze complexion and straight

white teeth. “But then again, who doesn’t need a set of good pots.”

Salesmen, who often move from product to product during their careers,

develop and refine their shtick over time. Like a comedy routine, good

jokes stay and duds disappear.

Marc Carter, 31, the Sponge King, threw out one of his best jokes as

his small audience disappeared.

“You don’t have to buy one; I’m used to rejection,” he said, pausing

for effect. “I’m married!”