7 keys to a healthier life, according to self-help authors

Sept. 18, 2024 6:30 AM PT

Good morning. Here’s what we’re covering today:

We spoke with expert thinkers, researchers and writers about how to live a more complete — and fulfilling — life.
California’s legal weed industry is in tumult after a Times investigation found pesticides in popular products.
Here’s a recipe for Salty Angeleno micheladas.
And here’s today’s eNewspaper

Actually good self-help authors have some tips for better living

A cynical person in front of a giant eye trying to practice hopeful skepticism

For a good chunk of my life, I thought self-help books were a scam. They hawked simple five-step solutions for how to “get the guy,” “10x your productivity” or “discover a new you.” I’d finish reading, test out the author’s newfangled method for a week and then find myself back at square one: unsatisfied with some of my life habits, but at a loss for how to tackle them.

I repeated the same cycle for an endless conveyor belt of trendy workouts, diets and beauty regimens that are especially inescapable here in California.

Eventually I realized I needed to find better books — ones that guided my own curiosity, rather than laid out my problems and vowed to solve them.

So I and Times staffers and contributors joined forces to find an exciting, eclectic mix of actually helpful self-help authors. Their conversations with The Times about their latest books seek to answer timely questions of our modern existence.

Here are 7 ways you can kick-start your own path to self-discovery.

Understand your brain. Long ago, our brains developed so-called cognitive biases, what writer Amanda Montell calls “innate psychological shortcuts that we’ve always taken to make sense of the world enough to survive it.” But these instincts may be working against us in the modern information era.
Build a balanced late life. If you want to live until 100, Maddy Dychtwald argues in her research-based “Ageless Aging” that you must take a truly holistic approach to your health.” That includes managing your medical care like a CEO, tending to your psychological and spiritual health and improving your financial literacy.
Master the art of being fearless. Zen priest Cristina Moon likes to approach life with her “belly button facing forward,” in other words, tackle challenges and opportunities without hesitation or dread. That’s just one of the crucial lessons she details in “Three Years on the Great Mountain,” where she tells the story of how she left her job as a human rights activist to train in a form of Japanese swordmanship called kendo at a Zen temple in Hawaii.
Make peace with grief. Grief is often framed in America as a journey with a clear beginning and end. But in “The Grief Cure,” journalist Cody Delistraty combines field research with first-hand experience to show loss, in its many forms, is never that linear.
Reframe your self-image. We all have different scripts for how our bodies should look, informed by our upbringings and the media. L.A. resident and culture critic Emma Specter reimagined her attitude toward her body with the help of a supportive community and a kind internal voice.
Ignite your relationships with eroticism. Our ever-advancing phones, computers and TV screens have begun to mold and meddle with modern-day relationships. It’s these unsettling phenomena famed psychotherapist Esther Perel aims to tackle in her most recent live speaking tour, “The Future of Relationships, Love & Desire.” She charts a course for how to overcome the pervasive feeling of alienation and find more satisfaction in your physical encounters: “Sex is never just sex,” she told me recently. “Even when you think it’s hit and run and it’s supposed to not mean anything, the effort not to make it mean something is meaningful.”
Rediscover hope during election season. Studies suggest cynics are often more depressed, heavier drinkers and lower earners than noncynics. But how do you avoid it in an election season?! Stanford psychology professor Jamil Zaki suggests in “Hope for Cynics” that we adopt a “hopeful skepticism.” “Being hopeful is not a matter of looking away,” he told Times reporter Deborah Netburn this month. “It’s a matter of looking more closely and more clearly.”

California is a place where you can choose your own spiritual adventure. I hope these conversations will pique a curiosity to look within.

The urge for temporary self-improvement may be tempting, but it’s self-discovery that will pay dividends to the very end.

Today’s top stories

A photo of a vape product called Backpack Boyz, which was found to contain pesticides.

California’s legal weed industry is in tumult after a Times investigation found pesticides in cannabis products

Records and interviews show California regulators have largely failed to address evidence of widespread contamination as the legal weed industry faces crumbling consumer confidence.
A Times investigation in June found alarming levels of pesticides in cannabis products available on dispensary shelves across the state.
Consuming weed that is contaminated with dangerous chemicals can have severe impacts on health including neurological damage and heart failure.

Sean “Diddy” Combs was denied bail after pleading not guilty to sex trafficking and racketeering charges

An indictment unsealed Tuesday accused the music mogul of running a “criminal enterprise” that threatened and abused women.
Federal prosecutors alleged Combs used his global business in the media, entertainment and lifestyle industries for the purpose of carrying out these crimes.
A sex trafficking expert analyzed the allegations against Combs — and what his indictment means about our changing views on how sex trafficking works.

Gov. Newsom slammed a Southern California city that banned homeless shelters

The governor threatened legal action against the city of Norwalk unless it reverses a ban on homeless shelters and other housing.
The news comes amid a broad debate over how to address homelessness in California. In Los Angeles County, voters in November will decide whether to double the quarter-cent sales tax that funds services for the homeless.
Meanwhile, thousands of L.A. tenants face eviction every year without lawyers. The city wants to fix that.

More big stories

Newsom signed two bills offering AI protections for actors.
California’s surgeon general set a goal of reducing maternal mortality by 50%.
California enacted a law reviving a Jewish family’s claim to Nazi-looted art, bucking one of the nation’s most powerful federal courts.
Drug-resistant germs will kill millions more people in coming decades, researchers warned.
Tooth decay still plagues California kids nearly a decade after Medi-Cal promised change.
A man pleaded not guilty to starting the Line fire that has ravaged San Bernardino County.
Meta, Snap, Google and others are racing to build smart glasses.

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Commentary and opinions

Donald Trump’s politics of hate have come for Taylor Swift, columnist Robin Abcarian writes.
The Trump assassination attempts are just the beginning; imagine what is coming after the election, Jacob Ware and Colin P. Clarke argue in a guest opinion.
Can legitimate campus protest be distinguished from antisemitism? This guide aims to help, write David N. Myers and Nomi M. Stolzenberg in a guest opinion piece.

Today’s great reads

A photo of a mother holding her 16-month-old daughter near a bus that has been converted into a home.

How a single mom turned a converted school bus into a dreamy live-work haven in Ojai. Tie-dye artist and former model Laura La Rue is raising her 16-month-old daughter in a former school bus. “I’m trying to be present for my daughter,” she said.

Other great reads

Are tiny black holes zipping through our solar system? Scientists hope to find out.

How can we make this newsletter more useful? Send comments to [email protected].

For your downtime

A view of Olafur Eliasson’s room-size light installation "Pluriverse assembly."

Going out

💡 Artist Olafur Eliasson’s thrilling new L.A. show whips up magic to pry open perception, our critic writes.
🎭 James Ijames confronts the grievous reality of lethal violence and racial injustice in “Kill Move Paradise.”
🧑‍🎨 Micro-galleries in Long Beach and beyond turn neighborhoods into mini-art districts.
🎸 REO Speedwagon will quit touring in 2025 amid the group’s “irreconcilable differences.”

Staying in

🏈 “American Sports Story: Aaron Hernandez,” available on FX and streaming on Hulu, shows how violence, drugs and football made a monster.
🍂 Here are the five biggest “Gilmore Girls” revelations from Kelly Bishop’s memoir.
📺 HBO’s “Stopping the Steal” examines Trump’s attempt to subvert 2020 election — and what it means for 2024.
🎤 Kathy Griffin’s voice in comedy won’t be silenced by Trump trauma, ageism or destroyed vocal cords.
🐕 Here’s a look at how dog dancing duo Roni & Rhythm took their paw-inspiring act to the next step on “America’s Got Talent.”
🥗 Here’s a recipe for Salty Angeleno micheladas.
✏️ Get our free daily crossword puzzle, sudoku, word search and arcade games.

And finally ... a great photo

Show us your favorite place in California! Send us photos you have taken of spots in California that are special — natural or human-made — and tell us why they’re important to you.

Today’s great photo is from Barbara DeLaRonde-Leach of Palm Desert: the Rady Shell at Jacobs Park in San Diego, where she sought a “reprieve from the desert heat” by attending a smooth jazz concert.

Barbara writes: “It was an afternoon/evening event at stunning venue located on the water at the marina. Acoustics and atmosphere were amazing, as were the spacious seating areas and grassy knoll where refreshments could be had.”

Have a great day, from the Essential California team

Ryan Fonseca, reporter
Defne Karabatur, fellow
Andrew Campa, Sunday reporter
Hunter Clauss, multiplatform editor
Christian Orozco, assistant editor
Stephanie Chavez, deputy metro editor
Karim Doumar, head of newsletters

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