Would it hurt to scare up a drink?

Talking to Justin Tanner explains how he got to be so prolific a playwright. Words and thoughts spill out of him.

The 40-year-old author of “Teen Girl,� “Pot Mom,� “Happytime Xmas,� “Coyote Woman� and coauthor of “Zombie Attack!� lives in Montecito Heights with his partner, Kristian Hoffman.

His most recent hit play, “Wife Swappers,� will soon be revived in a longer form, “like the director’s cut,� Tanner calls it. He’s also developing a new show with Laurie Metcalf and Fred Willard called “Voice Lessons.� Both shows will be at the Third Stage in Burbank later this month.

Horrific fare

I’m up early with the sun during the week. So on Saturday, Kristian and I -- I’m going to call him my husband, but we’re not even married and I’m not into that whole debate -- we’ll stay in bed with the cat, Oscar, and watch horror films. Whatever DVD of a sci-fi, special-effects, horror film came out on Tuesday, we’ll watch that. And then watch it again with all the commentary.

Now if there’s a horror film playing in theaters -- and there are a lot these days -- we might go for breakfast at Billy’s in Glendale. There’s a retro feeling there; they have giant photographs of what Glendale used to look like on the walls. We always get the same waitress who tells us off-color jokes, but she’s really fabulous. It’s like a deli with omelets and stuff on Orange Street, and it’s close to the theaters. But we go back for the waitress.

Keyboard cocktail

My husband recently got a baby grand piano. I used to play -- but 17 years ago -- and now I’m practicing all the time. We both really believe in the cocktail hour. That sounds so pretentious. But at 5 p.m. I make a martini and sit at the piano and practice. Kristian calls it my Noel Coward moment.

If I have a play running, I go to the theater. I still stage-manage all the plays I write. Lately I’ve been at the Third Stage on Magnolia Boulevard in Burbank, and I end my weekend nights there. The guy who runs it, James Henriksen, built a lounge in the back of the theater called the Grotto. After the show, I make margaritas. I started this last summer, and it’s like a big private party. The only way to get in is if you see a show. It’s like going to the world’s most private club.

Standard habitue

Sunday I like to go to Gingergrass in Silver Lake and have ... I don’t even know how to pronounce it. Pho. The soup comes so hot and steaming -- it’s like getting a facial -- but it takes a long time to eat, which I like, because I can read the paper.

Then I go across the street to the Silverlake Wine store. I know nothing about wine, but someone once got me a bottle of Chateauneuf-du-Pape that I liked, so I always get that.

Villa Sombrero on York Boulevard, where they serve margaritas in a fishbowl, is really the only place within 15 blocks of our house. They have pollo Andaluse -- chicken with white wine, bacon and olives -- and the pork barbecue, which is really good.

When I have a script due, I check into the Standard Hotel downtown -- into one of their Wow! rooms with a bathtub that can fit six people. I’m a weirdo. As soon as I started making money, I started staying in hotels. At the Standard, room service comes in about 20 seconds. I bet I stayed there 30 days this year. I can show up at 8 a.m. and ask for an early check-in. To write, it’s perfect.

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-- Robin Rauzi