LAUGH LINES

Taking a Shortcut: “President Bush and Mexico’s President Vincente Fox parted the best of friends. . . . As Bush was heading home, President Fox showed him a much faster way across the border--there’s a hole in the fence.� (Jay Leno)

Bon Appetit: “Do you know what Hannibal Lecter calls a comedy-club audience? . . . Happy meals.� (R.J. Johnson)

Great Adventures: “Disney’s new California Adventure [theme park] opened in Anaheim and upset state energy officials with its roughly 150,000 light bulbs. . . . So it really is an adventure. . . . At any moment, you could be stuck on that Ferris wheel--for the rest of the winter.� (Argus Hamilton)

Party Time: “Liz Taylor celebrates her 69th. . . . That’s Liz’s birthday, not the number of her ex-husbands.� (Kenny Noble Cortes)

They’re Multiplying: “There’s more problems for [Jesse] ‘Action Jackson.’ . . . According to papers, it seems there’s another woman involved. . . . I don’t know how many more there are, but I understand next month in Washington, they’re holding the ‘Million Mistress March.’ � (Leno)

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