Gwyneth Paltrow, humiliated? Ladies, start your razors ... - Los Angeles Times
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Gwyneth Paltrow, humiliated? Ladies, start your razors ...

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Oh, Gwyneth Paltrow, even being humiliated looks good on you!

Paltrow got down with some girl talk on “The Ellen DeGeneres Show†Friday when the host brought up the dramatic, see-through dress the “Iron Man 3†star rocked at the Hollywood premiere Wednesday night.

You know the one. It was sheer down the sides from waist to toes?

Ellen tried to be genteel about it, but Gwyneth was more direct.

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“I think there’s questions here,†said the host, “and the question to me is ... “

“Why is her [booty] hanging out?†Paltrow parried.

“It just appears you don’t see anything in the area where you’d see a ...â€

“Underwear?â€

Well, yes, GP, underwear. Where was the underwear? We know it wasn’t under the dress, that’s for sure.

Turns out the missing panties weren’t the real story, however.

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“I kind of had a disaster,†admitted People’s most beautiful woman of 2013. “I was doing a show and I changed there and I went and I couldn’t wear underwear†-- then she caught herself -- “I don’t think I can tell this story on TV!â€

Ellen, being Ellen, urged her on.

“Let’s just say everyone went scrambling for a razor. And so I went from being the most beautiful to the most humiliated in one day.â€

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Oy.

And that was Ellen’s reaction, too. Not to mention having even more questions about the situation.

“I work a ‘70s vibe,†Paltrow said. “If you know what I mean.â€

And Ellen did know!

“I don’t, I don’t, I don’t,†the actress clarified, but by this time imaginations, and giggles, were in overdrive. “OK, end cut!â€

DeGeneres tried to move the interview along, to no avail. “How can I get off that topic? That’s impossible. We’re all thinking about that now.â€

Why yes. Yes, we are. And we dare you to stop. Because we can’t.

Just watch the video up top. It’s fairly hilarious.

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